operation harelip BJ is a go
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Randomize