i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
