I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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