Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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