i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
