put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
