I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
