ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
