i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
The ass gains better be worth it
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