Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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