I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
