We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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