You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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