I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
