We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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