Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
