I must be too annoying 4 u.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
