is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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