singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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