Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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