We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
