oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
