Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
