ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
