i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
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