I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize