hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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