Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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