My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
