bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize