Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
