i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
