Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
