so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
