new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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