He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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