omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
