god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
