One girl and one boy is just not enough.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
