I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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