Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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