Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
