i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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