Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
