I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
