Dual....:-)
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
