If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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