I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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