Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
