First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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