worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
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