Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
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